


With and Without You

by daire



Category: Highlander - All Media Types
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2001-04-05
Updated: 2001-04-05
Packaged: 2018-12-18 05:47:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11867982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daire/pseuds/daire
Summary: Note from Daire, the archivist: this story was originally archived atDaire's Fanfic Refuge. Deciding to give the stories a more long-term home, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in August 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address onDaire's Fanfic Refuge's collection profile.





	With and Without You

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Daire, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Daire's Fanfic Refuge](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Daire%27s_Fanfic_Refuge). Deciding to give the stories a more long-term home, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in August 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Daire's Fanfic Refuge's collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/dairesfanficrefuge/profile).

With and Without You by Daire

_With and Without You_

By Daire 

This was in response to a Mid-Week Challenge on the HL Holyground Forum to write a short scene involving at least two HL characters, a public place, and a jukebox....with no dialogue, and all communication between characters must take place by way of the song(s) chosen. 

* * *

Somehow he'd managed to be cajoled by Richie and Methos to go out and do something. They both knew what day it was. It was a double anniversary for Richie. It was the day of the year Duncan least wanted to do anything joyful on. It was his day of remembrance. The day he'd lost Tessa. It had been eight years now that she'd been gone. 

They had trekked an hour or two to an antique mall. Methos and Richie weren't into it as much as they thought Duncan might. He was, after all, the one interested in antiques. To Richie, the two Immortals in his company _were_ antiques. At the huge building with years' worth of antiques, Duncan perused some pieces with a critical eye, Richie made fun of the insane stuff people actually had to have bought at one time, and Methos swore a few of his things were there. 

On their way back to Seacouver, they stopped at a roadside diner for dinner. It was decked out in 1950's kitsch, complete with little jukeboxes at each table. The music ranged from the Fifties to the recent pop stuff. Tessa had always liked the environment of these kinds of places, it had been one of her idiosyncrasies. And Richie just got a kick out of the décor, glad he hadn't grown up in the Fifties. 

Duncan sat remembering the last time he and Tessa had been to one of these places. Not long before he had asked her to marry him. Methos sat staring at the other two Immortals with him and out the window, every so often letting out a sigh that no one was saying anything. He made a few attempts to start a conversation, but failed miserably. Richie sat and thought of Tessa being gone as well as his gaining Immortality. None of the trio really spoke except to order. 

Just after they had ordered, a teenage girl and her boyfriend came in and sat in the booth behind Methos and Richie's side of their table, giving Duncan a clear view between their heads. The girl was giggling, and the boy laughing. They couldn't be more than seventeen or eighteen years old. Young love. Duncan hid a small smile as he remembered the early days of his and Tessa's relationship. So long ago, but it felt like yesterday. 

A quarter plunked into the jukebox, and Duncan watched as the girl chose a song. A few moments later, the soft instrumental beginning to a recent pop song started. Duncan wasn't up on his pop music, but it sounded like one of those boy bands he'd heard about. As the lyrics started, he let them creep into his mind. 

_When the visions around you_   
Bring tears to your eyes   
And all that surround you   
Are secrets and lies 

How many times had the sight of the few things of Tessa's that he'd kept made him misty? He'd woken up more than once with tears in his eyes and his heart breaking all over again. And his life was one giant secret from those who didn't know about Immortals. He'd lied countless times to people over the ages. 

_I'll be your strength_   
I'll give you hope   
Keeping your faith when it's gone   
The one you should call   
Was standing here all along 

Tessa had been his strength, some days she was the only reason he kept going in hope of a better tomorrow. But she wasn't standing there anymore. Tessa was gone. Forever. Lord, he wished he could have her back. 

_And I will take_   
You in my arms   
And hold you right where you belong   
'Til the day my life is through 

He'd done that, the night she'd been shot. She should have been in his arms, at home or on their way there. If he hadn't stayed behind to look at Wolf's files. Tessa resided in his heart now, the only place she could belong. He had stood at her grave after the funeral and vowed he would hold her in his soul and never forget her in all his lives. 

_This I promise you_

The exact words he'd uttered after his vow. 

Their food came then, and Duncan missed the next verse as the plates were distributed and he added a few condiments to fix it to his liking. When he finished and started eating, he let the song's words reach him again. 

_Over and over I fall_   
When I hear you call   
Without you in my life baby   
I just wouldn't be living at all 

More than once, he'd felt himself fall, if not physically, emotionally. When he thought he'd never love again; never find another who would look at him with loving eyes. 

In the dead of some nights, he'd sworn he'd heard Tessa call to him, whispering in his ear. Sometimes it was during daylight, he'd think he saw her out of the corner of his eye and when he'd look fully, there was nothing there. His life was empty without her, and he hadn't been living. 

He _lived,_ but he wasn't _living_ life. And he had all the time in the world to do it. Instead, he chose to live a life like a normal mortal would. Work, eat, sleep, fight his own demons whether they were within him or in the form of another Immortal during a challenge. 

The rest of the song repeated and Duncan let his mind take it in one ear and out the other. The parts he had paid attention to were a sign. An epiphany. He had to start _living_ and experiencing again. Just as he had as a younger Immortal; a child learning. 

He could hear Tessa then, in the back of his mind, _You have to live, Duncan. I'll be with you._

Duncan closed his eyes, partly to shield the sadness in them from his friends, partly to bring forth an image of his love. 

_I will, Tessa. This I promise you, I will._

04/05/01 

* * *

Obviously, I used _This I Promise You_ by NSync. 

© 2001   
Please send comments to the author! 

04/15/2001 

* * *


End file.
